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Doolaid: Failure is a Certainty

Dear Fellow Vols Fan,

Do you believe Coach Dooley has damaged Tennessee Football beyond repair? Are you just plain fed up with this smug, self-righteous, narcissistic lawyer; this nagging, lecturing product of the ivory tower, inflicting blow after blow upon our beloved Program with his destructive, discredited “Vols For Life” policies?

If so, take heart. Clay Travis will show us in his upcoming book, Dool-aid: Failure is a Certainty, why turning Tennessee around takes guile, nerve, courage, guts — in other words, all the qualities Dooley sorely lacks. But it can be done.

You may recall Dooley once telling former UT Athletic Director Mike Hamilton — “Mike, I have a gift.” Apparently, that “gift” is the magical ability to finish last in the SEC and … while simultaneously reassuring our most bitter rivals he’s the  Southeastern Conference’s version of Neville Chamberlain, willing and eager to appease them.  This appeasement was clear within the last two weeks  as Dooley elected  not to  return calls and emails from five star quarterback Gunner Kiel  decommited from Indiana and opened up his recruiting.  Kiel eventually committed to LSU.

Clay’s talent is an uncanny ability to analyze seemingly intractable problems and challenges… opening up gaping holes in them… and hitting upon effective solutions that astound you with their clear-thinking, level-headed brilliance.

We need a leader not a laughingstock

Dooley who seems to think he’s that he is Mitch McDeere from the Firm, rather than the leader of the University of Tennessee Football Program — views going head to head with brutal coaches like James Franklin, Nick Saban, Joker Phillips, Mark Richt, and Will Muschamp akin to afternoon tea in the faculty lounge.

Clay Travis recognizes exactly what kind of men these opponents are: Hard-driving, vicious, cutthroat sociopaths, who leave blood all over the gridiron and fight to the bitter end to gain maximum advantage for their respective football programs.

Using his amazing knack for “reading” individuals, Travis will reveal why Dooley will never understand our rivals — and why he will always remain a joke in the eyes of fans and a danger to the Vols return to a “Decade of Dominance”.

Travis adds: We might as well face the fact that Dooley will always be a menace to the Tennessee Football Program. If you think a faddish slogan of  “VFL” will satisfy his lackluster success in recruiting  blue chip prospects and winning an SEC game, think again. Travis shows us why in Dooley’s warped thinking, Tennessee can never impose enough threat to meet his idea of “competitive football.”

This will be hands down Clay Travis’s most important book — even better reads than his classic, phenomenal bestsellers, On Rocky Top or Dixieland Delight .  Both of these tomes are considered to be “must reads” for all SEC fans.

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About Capers Bar

I am retired Army officer. I used to fly helicopters and airplanes while I was in the Army. Nowadays, I do other things that are not so cool and sexy. I decided to write about my journey or whatever you want to call it towards running a half-marathon this fall. I have been running since 1983, I have run the Duke City full and half marathons. I don't run that fast anymore, I did win a 10K when I was 21, those days are mercifully past me. The fastest mile I have turned is a 5:05 during one of those Army physical fitness test 2 mile runs. The point I am making is that I am old, slow, and experienced runner. I named the blog after my running buddy, Bandit, an Australian Blue Heeler. He is my 3rd K-9 running buddy, the previous two dogs were black labs. I hope to write about some of my discussions that I have with Bandit in the future. I once owned, but since sold and a satirical and irreverent sports blog that was moderately successful. I was published in the left-wing national sports media by Sports Illustrated and ESPN. I am "stuck" in Alabama working for a military contractor. I am working so fricking hard to get back to Southeast New Mexico or West Texas. Fingers and toes crossed.

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